If you’ve ever had a child diagnosed with a mental health disorder, you know that it’s like entering a new world. Suddenly you are bombarded by new vocabulary, new ideas, new worries, new solutions, and new problems to encounter. Our son was diagnosed with ADHD in October, and I’ve been relying on the Lord in navigating this new world. Whether your child has ADHD, Autism, depression, anxiety, or bipolar disorder and others, here are some thoughts from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on raising a child with a mental health disorder.
Christ loves all of us exactly the way we are
We are each beloved children of God with divine purpose. Our Heavenly Parents need us to have unique experiences, insights, talents, and challenges so that we can contribute to building their kingdom. Even mental health disorders, as hard as they may be, make up the person we are meant to be. From the struggles we may have with our mental health, we can learn valuable lessons, have empathy for others, see the world in a different way, and rely on divine help.
My child’s ADHD diagnosis has made me see him in a different way. While there are many hard things that come with ADHD that he is going to have to work on throughout his life, there are also many blessings. Being hyperactive, my son is always ready to have fun and has a contagious personality. He loves people and is very friendly. I know that he will bless the lives of others as he focuses on his strengths.
Faith and medical resources work together
As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we believe in the importance of faith and prayer. The scriptures are full of stories of people being healed through their faith from a variety of ailments. Many people believe that mental health problems can be resolved simply through prayer, having faith, and righteously living the gospel. However, mental disorders are just as real and can be just as serious as a physical injury or illness. One of my favorite General Conference talks about mental health is “Like a Broken Vessel by Jeffry R Holland”. While the talk focuses on depression, it can also be applied to other mental health disorders. “If you had appendicitis, God would expect you to seek a priesthood blessing and get the best medical care available. So too with emotional disorders.”
I felt very anxious about labeling our child with ADHD and considering medication while he was so young. After praying about it a lot, I felt strongly that getting professional help was what we needed. Heavenly Father guided me to the right doctor who put my nerves at ease and helped me begin this unexpected journey.
Christ knows their burdens
While we as parents may feel some of the pain our children experience, no one truly understands their pain like the Savior. Just as He suffered for us, He suffered for our children. He felt the pain of our afflictions in this life time, physical, mental, and emotional (Alma 7:11). We need to have hope and faith in Christ that we can be perfected through Him for ourselves and for our kids.
We need to teach our kids to fully rely on the Lord to overcome our struggles and to seek relief from our pain. While this is an important truth for all children to understand, it will strengthen my son knowing that he can turn to God for help and have hope that one day his mind will be perfected along with his body.
Leaning on our ward family
As Elder Erich W. Kopischke of the Seventy said in his 2021 General Conference talk about mental health, “…many people will mourn with us; they won’t judge us.” Our wards or branches are more than just people we attend church with, they need to be like a family to us. We need to serve each other and emphasize with one another. We’re each going through challenges, and we need the love and support of others rather than judgement.
In our case, we don’t need others to mourn with us, but we need their empathy. It has warmed my heart to feel love and acceptance towards my son with people I have shared his diagnosis with, and even with those I haven’t. Even though he was almost 5 when he potty-trained, a little older than most children, my friends from church were excited for me and let me share what felt like a huge victory for me. We have felt support from those who have helped entertain his wild self during Sacrament Meeting. His primary teachers have shown how much they care about him as we’ve worked together to help him succeed in Primary. As you turn to your ward family, you might be surprised by their love and support.
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