The 9 Best Kept Secrets To Arguing Without Fighting

Have you ever been in an argument? Sure, you have, we all have. What if you had nine secrets that helped you argue without fighting? Would that help you in the future?

Many of us feel that we must win the argument to win the fight. This couldn’t be further from the truth. These secrets can help you next time you find yourself in an argument that is headed for a fight.

You can use these secrets in your work relationships, friendships, spouse or significant other relationships, and everything in between. Use several of them in a conversation, or use one or two of them in a conversation that is on the edge of an argument that could lead to an all-out fight. These secrets are ideal for diffusing a situation and turning the situation around.

Secret One

Learn the phrase, “To put it another way…” This phrase can help you to simplify something that someone doesn’t understand. It can help you break something down into smaller increments so that it’s not overwhelming to the other person. This is an ideal phrase in work relationships or if you’re the boss and need more cooperation.

Secret Two

This key phrase is another great argument strategy to use to avoid a fight. Learn to say, “In essence…” Now, you can briefly summarize the situation as you see it. Clarify any points that you don’t fully understand. Give the other person some time to either agree or clarify the brief synopsis of the situation or conversation.

Secret Three

Listen to what the other party has to say, and then think about it for a moment. Now, repeat your understanding of the conversation by saying, “As I see it…” and explain what you just understood them to be saying to you.

Secret Four

Perhaps you know that the other person is in the wrong. You know that they said something, but they seem to have forgotten. This phrase can be helpful to you in responding. Say, “If I’m not mistaken…” and then repeat what you think was already agreed to or whatever the situation requires. This statement leaves the conversation open for them to agree or to recall something that they may have said previously.

Secret Five

Did someone give you a great tip? Perhaps you were given a suggestion or idea that you’re not quite sure about yet. You could say something like, “I appreciate your input. Let’s also consider this… as an option as well.” This is a great way to introduce another idea that may be even better than the previous idea. It can go far to helping you with arguing without fighting.

Secret Six

Maybe you suddenly have a brilliant idea. Perhaps you need to diffuse the situation quickly. This phrase can work both ways. Say something along the lines of, “Would you be open to…” Make sure to have a great workaround or strategy that will put the other person in a good light, as well as yourself.

Secret Seven

Did your coworker catch an error that you might have missed? Maybe you overspent your account, and your spouse found out. A simple “Thank you for catching that…” can do wonders to turn things around at that moment and change a negative to a positive. By telling the other person, “Thank you,” you have diffused the situation because you’ve just acknowledged something.

Secret Eight

Sometimes, it takes us longer than other times to resolve something. It’s nice to let the other person know you appreciate them by simply telling them, “Thank you for your patience.” They will feel appreciated and realize that you were trying to work things out.

Secret Nine

Have you ever been to Chick-fil-A? If you have, you’ve heard one of the employees say, “My pleasure.” You can say, “My pleasure,” or, “I’m happy to help you, ” to thank someone or tell them that you didn’t mind helping them out in some fashion.

One of the best-kept secrets to arguing without fighting is to turn the situation around to put the other person in the best possible light. You can learn to do this with practice. Have you ever purchased something and brought it home only to wonder how you were talked into it? That’s the secret of a good salesperson. They talked you into something. You can learn to focus on a person’s positive and not even bring up the negative, leaving the other person feeling better about themselves.