The Idea of Home: a Reflection on Mary at the Cross

Pieta: Mary at the Cross — Pieta: Our Mother of Sorrows Chapel – Washington, D.C. (Photo by A. Laflamme)

The idea of home is a theme that God has very clearly been encouraging me to reflect on – for our Church, our family, and in our hearts.

Recent events inspired this reflection on John 19:27. What does it mean when Jesus gives Mary to John as his Mother? If we are to imitate John, what does it mean to take Mary into our home?

New Homes in Life

For background, here are the events: a church fire, a new house, and a time to reflect.

Home for Our Church

The Fire

Two years ago, there was a fire in our church that caused smoke damage throughout.

Praise God the building was saved; however, it was going to be an expensive cleanup.

In addition, the parish decided that this was the time to address structural issues that were needed.

An Exodus

So we moved out and began having mass at the highschool gym. Then school started and we found a new home in the city hall basement. And finally our parish found a home for a while at the old Dollar General building!

Each location took getting used to, but each Sunday we had the same mass that united us with Heaven and the universal Church that we call Home.

Coming Home

Finally, we moved back into our building last week – fully restored, cleaned, and improved to serve as a home for our parish for many years to come.

Our pastor’s first homily back in the church could be summarized as “Welcome home.”

Side Altar of Mary — Our Newly Restored Church!

Home for Our Family

My wife, Katie, and I have had dreams since getting married of a home with a little bit of land.

This always seemed far away. We have toured houses with acreage in the past few years but none of them felt like home or the right time.

Last month, when Katie showed me an old house in town, I agreed to visit fully expecting another tour that would be more fun than real.

When we walked onto the land for the tour, the kids ran out into the yard. They poked their little faces through the split in a tree and smiled. It felt like home.

We finished the tour and made an offer, excited to hear back.

A Time to Reflect

Then, a roadblock. The offer was put on pause.

Something in a previous contract on the property meant we would have up to 15 days before hearing about our offer.

It’s an odd feeling to have such a big part of our future in someone else’s hands.

Fifteen days of praying and waiting forced Katie and I to really evaluate what “home” means to us. How is the home supposed to serve our family mission of getting our selves and others to Heaven?

We couldn’t quite celebrate the new, but we had to have a detachment from the current place we live.

We love our current house. It does feel like home, but we knew it wouldn’t be ours forever. It doesn’t entirely fit our mission of who we want to be as a family.

The home is clearly more than a structure, it requires persons.

Finally, on the day our Church opened back up, we got the call that we would be going forward with our offer! It was the announcement of two new homes in one day!

The Idea of Home in Scripture

All of these experiences reminded me of a time that I was praying with John 19:27.

From the cross, Our Lord says, “Behold, your mother.”

“And from that hour the disciple took her into his home”
John 19:27

Jesus said this to the apostle John in the moment, but it has been understood always to be a message to all of us. We are meant to imitate John.

A Deeper Idea of Home

I felt called to look deeper into this passage, specifically as it describes “home”.

In the Greek translation, the Gospel doesn’t use the word for “home” (Σπίτι or Spíti). Instead it says, “…took her into his ídia”.

What is “ἴδια”

This word could be used to mean “own” or “same” and comes from the word for ownership or “pertaining to one’s self”.

Rereading the passage in this light gives a new depth to Jesus’ words.

The translation is pointing to the fact that John took Mary in to the home, or “the place that he owns”. But “the place that John owns” is also more than just a building.

Elsewhere in scripture, ἴδια is used to describe my own sheep, my own language, my own country, and even my own life!

Luke 18:28 alludes to the disciples leaving “all they had” or ἴδια to follow Jesus.

Now we see the apostle John is truly taking Mary into all that he has.

Taking Mary Into Our Home

How can we imitate John, the beloved apostle?

Mary in Our Church

The Church has done so by recognizing Mary as Queen Mother of Heaven and Earth, by asking for her intercession in the liturgy, and celebrating her feasts.

Many of our churches have side altars where we can kneel and ask for Mary’s intercession while in the presence of her Son.

Mary in Our Homes

One way to bring Mary into your home is by having an icon, painting, or figurines that remind you of her the same way you would for family members that you love.

When we move into our new home, we plan to have a part of our home dedicated to prayer. Here we home to have an icon of Mary, and some statues of Saints that we love.

We can also bring Mary into our home by praying the Rosary to reflect on her life wit Jesus. There are also shorter Marian prayers you could pray together in the home: the Angelus, Memorare, or Regina Caeli.